Well, gentlemen, I continue the topic of finances in a relationship with a woman! In the last article, I explained the deeper meaning of a man’s “payment actions” towards a woman and demonstrated that the question of “does a man pay for a woman” is not a financial issue, but a matter of protection and responsibility. The previous article is a material that gives the key to understanding what I will write below. And below I will analyze examples from life - should a man pay for a woman in some situations, say, a restaurant, theater, joint vacation, etc. I will consider two options: when a man and woman live together and when they don’t. But before reading this article, I strongly recommend that you read the previous one: “Who is a real man? Part 5.4.1. Should a man pay for a woman? Basic principles". Especially for those who cannot distinguish a normal man from Alen and consider what is written below as a model of Alen’s behavior. If the previous article does not help, then the doctor will help, but this is no longer my area of expertise...
Once again briefly the main idea:
If a man perceives a woman as a woman and does not intend to hide his relationship from her, he pays for her. If a man does NOT perceive a woman as a woman and wants to demonstrate this to her, he does NOT pay for her.
SEPARATE ACCOUNT IS A SIGN OF SAME-SEX RELATIONSHIP
In a nutshell, that's it. Below are specific examples and recommendations.
What does a man pay for if he lives with a woman?
In this case, the couple can either be officially married or not. If we talk about everyday issues, then from what was written in the article about the family budget, it is clear that a man ideally pays for everything and always . Cafe, theater - here too. Of course, there may be exceptions, for example, a woman decided to surprise a man, bought theater/cinema/concert tickets or even a vacation package and gave it to him - no question. She gave and gave, a good sign of a healthy relationship. Well, or today, for some reason, he doesn’t have enough money to go to a movie or a restaurant, but she does, and this is the money that he previously allocated to her for personal expenses. I think nothing bad will happen if she pays for the evening. In both examples, no compensation is required from the man.
A woman pays only in exceptional cases
If she earns money herself, again, there is no problem, if somehow, as an exception, she pays for evening or other entertainment events for two . But as soon as this becomes regular, expect trouble. I repeat, the point here is not that the woman is a materialistic bitch who demands money from a man. In the previous article “Should a man pay for a woman? Basic principles” I told in detail that at the level of instincts, a woman needs care and protection from a man, and paying for something by a man is one of the manifestations of protection. If a woman begins to pay for herself and, especially, for her man, she ceases to feel protected, and on this basis the relationship will begin to deteriorate, whether we want it or not. Even if you voluntarily and consciously agreed to rent an apartment in half, your agreements are void, since they contradict the nature of men and women ...
If you don't have the money to pay for her, don't invite her.
So, guys, the conclusion is this: if you don’t have the money to fully pay for housing to live with your girlfriend, hold off on moving and live separately for now . Then later you will have a chance to prove yourself a real man and take full payment. And if you hurry up and get involved in paying 50/50, you will spoil your impression and then it will be extremely difficult, if not impossible, to restore it.
When does a man pay if he doesn't live with a woman?
Here the situation is a little more complicated, but the general principle is the same: a woman needs male protection, which, among other things, is expressed financially . If a man and a woman do not live together, it means that both have their own personal source of income - work, parents, passive income from renting out an apartment, etc. - it’s not so important which one. At the same time, the depth of the relationship can be different: someone just met yesterday, while some couple have been dating for a year and are planning to move in together/get married.
Separate accommodation - separate budget
It is clear that, regardless of the depth of the relationship, if a man does not live with a woman, he does not support her and does not pay her household expenses . Everyone runs their own household. Moreover, it would be strange on the second day of meeting a man to suddenly become involved in all the problems of a woman and rush to solve them. In the end (that is, after marriage) this should happen, but a man taking on the burden of responsibility, including financial, for a woman should happen smoothly and gradually .
Spending time together is a man’s responsibility and budget
Guys, as soon as a woman is near you, the situation changes.
EVEN IF A MAN AND A WOMAN MET MEET YESTERDAY, THE MAN IS FULLY RESPONSIBLE FOR THE SAFETY, COMFORT AND FINANCIAL INDEPENDENCE OF THE WOMAN IN THE HOURS AND MINUTES THAT SHE IS AROUND HIM.
I will make a reservation that this principle is relevant if a man perceives a woman as his future woman, and not as an asexual being to whom he is indifferent and with whom he does not plan any relationship.
For example, you met, you invited her to a movie tomorrow night, and she agreed. Thus, you took full responsibility for her during your stay together and you automatically got into the following events:
1. Complete organization of all events, taking into account time and place (choosing a movie session, booking a table in a restaurant after the movie, etc.
2. Full payment for cinema tickets.
3. Full payment for all accompanying events before, during and after the movie (popcorn, skating rink, amusement park, dinner in a cafe, etc.). Moreover, you organize the content, quantity and duration of these events, focusing on the needs of the girl, and not on your toad.
4. Safe delivery of the girl to the door of her house (here I mean that you have completed all the activities late and dark in the evening, and during the day you can let her go alone without any problems). Delivery options may be different, your presence is not required, but in all cases you are responsible. For example:
- you carry it yourself in your car;
- you order and pay for a taxi and, ideally, you should be sure that this taxi driver will not harm her;
- if she is forced to get home by public transport (for example, you both have no car and there is no money for a taxi, or the wait time for a taxi is 40 minutes, etc.), you go with her and accompany her to the door of the house. If it’s already one in the morning, and you have to get up at five in the morning, it doesn’t give a fuck. You knew what you were getting into, you had to plan everything in advance, take into account all the risks and think through options for solving them. On the good side, it was better to refuse the movie today and invite her another day, so that you could see her off and get some sleep in the morning.
5. If the start of the event and your meeting are already scheduled for a late and dark evening, it is also advisable for you to take care of her safe and comfortable trip to your meeting. Ideally, pick it up yourself by car. If this is not possible today, let him take a taxi. It's okay if she orders and pays for it herself (and YOU do the rest!), but you'll look really cool if you order and pay for it yourself. Fortunately, today both ordering and paying for a taxi are easily done through mobile applications.
Guys, something like this
